4UrWorld

This is going to be a long post, so if you don’t want to read it you better just LEAVE now!

Okay, so you don’t want to hear me complain.  Sure I hate getting freakin’ older.  Who doesn’t?  So I hate the so-called “Curse” us women have to go through every freakin’ month.  I don’t like the mood swings.  God a man couldn’t put up with what we do each month, much less childbirth.  If a man had to give birth, they wouldn’t be in the mood for “SEX” all the time either. 

You think I like the fact that I can’t lose weight as easily as I used to.  I have to work hard at trying to stay fit.  I hate the word retirement, the next step is death.  The term “Golden Years” makes me want to puke!  “Life starts at 40″!  Who the hell came up with that saying?  Hell everything goes to pot after 40, you can’t read without bifocals or reading glasses, your kids leave home and your parents are aging.  WTF

I worked hard at raising three kids and people don’t understand why I get emotional when they leave each time to go back to college, or continue their lives, not to give Mom another thought, until they need something.  They even do things just to “Spite” Mom.  What’s the deal?  The other day I told my kids to be careful in the pool, what they were doing was dangerous.  My daughter looked at me and said “More the reason to do it, because you don’t want me to”.  WTF

I have been faithful to my husband, there for my kids, and I have been an obedient daughter.  I have done everything I could to please everyone in my life.  Just to hear words from them like “You complain too much”, “Just the more reason to do it, because you don’t want me to”, and “you need to get a job and quit feeling sorry for yourself”.  WTF

You don’t think raising kids, putting up with a husband in his ”I’m not sure if I’m ready to settle down” years, and putting up with an old stubborn Dad who is never wrong, isn’t a job.  Plus I have worked, most of my adult life, I worked at a bank for over 18 years, ran a business for 5 years, and still kept up with being a wife, mother and daughter.  I was also a costume maker at Halloween, I created stage Props at my daughters dance recitals, I have been to every football, basketball, and baseball game (even coached) that my kids have been involved in.  I was a cheerleader Mom, but not like the obsessed ones, I encouraged my daughter but didn’t push her.  I made cookies for the class parties and was class mom a year or two.  I had to go and stand up to a freakin’ teacher when she told my son he was stupid.  “You don’t mess with my kid, woman”.  I have been the bookkeeper, the cook, the laundry woman, I don’t like to clean, but I have to sometimes.  I have been a peacemaker, a counselor to a sister (going through a divorce).  I have spent hours at the hospital when my Mom was ill.   

This morning my husband told me “I complain to much”.  I think all I said was “I have a headache”.  For his information it is a MIGRAINE, which he has never experienced.  BTW migraines come with the freakin’ getting older syndrome. 

I have never been one of those wives who complain about my husband putting stuff off, like the floor tile for the kitchen, which he finally laid 2 1/2 years after the tile being bought.  I may have teased him.  I told him “it was Virgin Tile, it was never going to get laid”, but I never, not even once nagged at him about getting it done.  Hell I would have done it myself, but he would have found a reason to tell me I did it wrong.  So I put up with the nasty kitchen carpet until he finally got it done.  Believe you me; he is hell to be around when he is working on something like that.  He bitches and moans more than me.  WTF !

I am sorry to be so off the wall crazy with this blog post, but sometimes you can just take so much and you gotta “Speak Your Mind”.  Sometimes you even have to escape it all.  You wanna know a secret?  I keep a pair of shoes in my car.  I call them my “Run Away Shoes”.  When I am around the house I am usually barefoot, that is just how I am comfortable.  I want the security of knowing that if someone in my family pisses me off, instead of staying there and battling it out (they say I don’t know when to shut up) ((whatever !!)) I can leave for a while and cool off.  The shoes are in case I run out of gas or have a flat tire or something.  I consider them my emergency kit.

You know everyone I know complains about something.  My Dad complains about President Bush, do you hear me telling him he complains too much.  My Husband complains about his back hurting.  What do I do?  I usually rub it for him.  My Daughter complains about not having enough cloths or the perfect thing to wear.  OMG you should see her closet, so full of cloths.  My Son may complain because his cell phone doesn’t work sometimes, he thinks he needs to change carriers, shit all carriers have their problems, you can’t pick up service everywhere all the time. 

So if casually mentioning in conversation to my Husband that I had a headache, gets on his nerves.  Maybe I should put more than “Run Away Shoes” in my car.  Maybe I should have a whole “Run Away Bag” packed.  

 Sorry I am usually the nicest sweetest person you wanna meet, I really try my hardest to keep peace, but tell me I am complaining too much, you better run for them there hills buddy!!!

Okay enough with my ranting.  I will try to go back to that Wife, Mother, and Daughter everyone expects me to be.  Now where did I put my bottle of Xanax?

My New Business Card,

Designed by My Wonderful Daughter, Cari Caldwell.

This is a slide show of my Grandmother, Ferrol Annette Bradley Burkhalter and all the beautiful women in this world because my Grandparents fell in love so many years ago.  It is awesome because we have discovered the love letters, that my Grandmother and Grandaddy had written each other in 1932, they wrote these letters put them in the mail and it took several days to get to each other.  They only knew each other for a few months before they ran off to get married.  I also have a letter that her mother had written my Grandmother, I don’t think she was very happy about it all, yet my Grandparents marriage love and respect lasted their whole lives.  I have compiled a video of all of my Grandmother’s girls and their girls and so forth and so on.  We are all grateful for our slightly rebellious young lovers (Grandparents), if it wasn’t for them We wouldn’t be here.  Thank you Grandmother I love you and miss you.

Family Reunion Slide Show.  God why do I procrastinate?  It is who the freak I am.  Like it or not I procrastinate.  Then I get all this anxiety and want to go into “Shut Down Mode”. 

My computer’s slowing down because I have scanned so many family pictures for a slide show.  Everyone is depending on me.  It is like a puzzle now, who in this family belongs to who again?  hmmmmm…..I forget who the heck this person belongs to. (There is actually a Marth Lee and a Martha Lou who are first cousins, who confusing.)  So many pictures , so many people.  Can I just fake a coma and stay home in bed?  What songs to I put with these pictures?  What if I offend someone?

Can you guys tell I am no good under stress?  I’m supposed to do better under stress.  That is always how I have rolled.  Well crap, maybe I am getting…..No, No Way am I getting Old.  Screw that, I am not getting old.   I can do this….!!!

Wish me luck, or at least wish my husband luck. lol, he will need it when he comes home to this crazy emotionally unstable woman.    

But I must show you how pretty my Mom is and how handsome my Grandad was.

 The little girl at the first is me…Sorry about the long periods where the video is focused on one part, like the babies, I hope you didn’t get bored.  It was just kinda hard to edit the video after I downloaded it.   

I was at Affiliate Summit and visiting with Mark Weiglus from 45n5.com, he was in charge of the blog room.  As we visited the question came up, “What is your Niche”?  “What are you interested in”?  I was almost embarrased.  “I have no idea.” I thought to myself. 

Everyone in the Affiliate marketing community talk about finding your “Niche”.  Oh my God, I have no clue who I am.  I have been a wife and a mother for so many years and I have no idea what I am all about.  Sure I am all about my kids, and I love my husband, but my kids are grown, my husband has gotten a promotion and is all excited about his work and that is his life now. 

My Parents live close, and thank Goodness, I am close as they are getting older and time is something you can never get back.  I treasure each precious moment with my Parents.

There are so many women who have blogs about their kids, being a mom, strong women.  Yeah, yeah, yeah,….whatever!   I am nothing special.  Who am I?  I am like every other woman in the world who has dedicated their lives to their family.  Which is so admirable, don’t get me wrong, I am proud of myself, and I love my family more than life itself. 

But Who Am “I” ? 

Getting ready for an upcoming family reunion.  Guess who is in charge of the slide show and decorations?  Me of course, but that is okay, because I am finding some really cool negatives, that may have been tossed in the trash one of these days by some decendent that didn’t want to mess with them.  After my Grandmother passed away, they cleaned out her house put all pictures and negatives in a plastic container in my Mother’s closet.  Probably never to be looked at again until NOW !!

I decided to see what would happen if I took a negative, and scanned it and then used the negative tool on the photo program, and guess what? Two negatives make a Positive !!! Some really interesting pictures.  I can’t wait to create a very cool slide show with pictures people probably forgot or never knew existed. 

Here are just a few:

Are they taking a Potty Break? 

 Guy in a Truck

Camping with Prof Weatherby (I Think !)

I think this is really cool.  I enjoy finding these old pictures.  I have so many more and am really excited about asking my Mom and Dad who some of these people in these pictures may be…..  ; )

I have lived in Shamrock, Texas for most of my life. (their ain’t no way I am telling anyone how many years that is) but it is long enough. 

After the 1st of the year, everything here starts to focus on (you guessed it) St. Patrick’s Day.  Everyone here starts putting everything in their life on the back burner and they start planning for the “BIG” celebration. 

Over the years I have been involved in so many ways, from decorating the stage for the “Miss Irish Rose” beauty contest, designing the logo used for all advertising and tee shirts, helping my kids decorate their bikes, go-carts, and golf carts, so they can ride down the mile or two of main street, wave and throw candy. I have made an Irish Colleen dress for my daughter to wear because she was a hostess to the beauty contestants.   I have even painted store windows with Shamrock’s to make the town seem more festive, and so much more……

Am I tired of it?  Actually, YES !  I am going to have a lot of company that will crash at my house over the weekend.  So that actually means, I have to clean !!!!  Oh my God, I have to clean !!!!  I have to COOK !!!! 

I am sorry, I should be looking at this as such a festive event when my kids come home, bring their friends, there is laughter, there is fun, but there can also be drama.  Oh well “be positive, be positive, be positive, ………..”  If I say it enough, do you think I will convince myself? 

Okay here it is my list:

clean house, do laundry, buy groceries, make sure I have enough places for everyone to sleep, make sure my linens are clean and that means do more laundry, did I mention dust?  I have to sweep the front porch. 

Oh my I am a bitch, aren’t I? (can I say that on a blog?)

The thing is I want so much to focus on myself and my efforts here with my websites and blogs.  I just got back from Affiliate Summit West, I met so many people, and I have so many ideas in my head and now, I have to change channels in my brain, and think about St. Patrick’s Day. 

I need to make this a positive thing.  Maybe I will just post about the events, what I am doing to get ready and all the good things about the celebration……

Thanks for letting me vent….I needed to ! 

Okay, here in this small, some might say “hick town” in Texas, there isn’t much to do. We live about 2 miles from this small town, in the country. My kids have always enjoyed being able to have the freedom to have room to roam, to play in the fields. As my kids got bigger so have their toys. These are videos my son posted to YouTube. You can also take a look at his myspace to see more. This is actually just right in front of our house.

People from the cities may call this redneck, we call if fun. Don’t knock it till you’ve tried it. Funny thing is I have always been against my kids doing things dangerous, and I consider this to be a little on the dangerous side. My son asked me to ride with him in the S10 Blazer in the Videos, I did, I screamed, I held on, closed my eyes, cussed, and then all at once, something very strange happened. At the very same time I said “Can I Drive?” as he asked “Do You Want To Drive?”

It was Awesome!!!!

Do I Bug You??

I know I have a sense of humor and opinions that my family, sometimes don’t understand, my husband often rolls his eyes at me.

My Son had some of his friends over to my house, I guess I acted or said something different than what other’s moms may act.   He said “Mom you are weird”.  Oh Well, I am who I am, the kids haven’t quit coming around.  I really hate it when someone tells me how to act.

I love the Internet !!http://deanhunt.com on July 4th, wrote a post “I love the internet”. I say that exact thing ALL the time.  I love to search for information on the Internet. Any time my family has a question or a disagreement on something, I just say “I’ll go Google it”. For some reason that would Bug them.  I have gotten to the point where I won’t tell them I am going to go search the internet for the answer and I come back with the correct info.

Well I Love You !!I have always worried about Bugging people. Once a guy in high school told me to get lost, I was bothering him. I am now married to him…he says he doesn’t remember telling me that. He thought he was a ladies man, I guess talking to one girl too long might spoil his image.

We have been married for 25 years, and he is a good husband. The first few years weren’t the best, but we have matured and learned, sometimes you have to compromise, choose your battles, and let things go.

Life is full of bumps in the road, sometimes, great big chug holes, but you don’t stop driving, just keep going, repair what damage (if it is repairable) the bad roads may have caused. Sometimes you have to learn how to trust again after the trust is lost. For us it has been worth it.

Some advise from someone who has lived and learned: Every day tell that special someone in your life how beautiful they are, and how much you love them, even if it starts to seem a little routine. Thank them for all the things they do for you, no matter how small. I don’t go a day without telling my kids, my husband, and my parents that “I love them,”